You’ve spent a week expressing enough milk to supply a ice cream factory, you’ve stocked up on enough Calpol to sedate a crack addict and you’ve blown all your maternity pay on a babysitter.
Now you are finally ready to go for the first evening out you’ve had with your other half since your bundle of joy arrived. You’ve looked forward to this moment for weeks and are trying to banish the uneasy feeling that you’d much rather hibernate than venture to a restaurant. You haven’t shaved your legs in months so it looks like you’ve offset your dress with some fur leggings. You’d forgotten you used to be a double AA and your now double J boobs in a pre-pregnancy dress are giving your look a classy, I’ve-turned-to-prostitution-now air.
This is an extremely daft video clip, we hope you like it.